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The Business Forum Journal
"Dealing with Workplace Conflict" [Adapted from Common Materials]
By Henry H. Goldman
Individuals vary in their response to conflict, but there is remarkable consistency to the ways that a specific person will handle conflict. Identifiable patterns of personal behavior tend to be repeated in certain critical situations. These are known as "styles of conflict management." They are often described as those typical and preferred ways of behaving in conflict situations, which are both identified and explained in terms of how the learned values of the individuals apply. As the definitions imply, we can identify certain conflict management styles in ourselves and in others. These patterns develop over the period of a person's life through trial and error and through modeling after other people. Each style is an attempt by an individual to develop a satisfactory manner with which to handle the conflicts encountered in life. Behind each of these patterns lies a set of faith assumptions and values that determine which pattern will emerge as dominant. Five Common Styles of Management Conflict Styles of managing conflict are based on the behavioral patterns which we employ to master the situation. There are only two determining factors: (1) how important it is to us to solve the problem; and, (2) how concerned are we to maintain the relationship with others with whom we are in competition. The five ways of handling the situation follow: Win/Lose Style The Win/Lose style is characterized by a very high concern for achieving personal goals in a conflict, even at the risk of damaging or destroying the relationship with the other party. "We will win at all cost; the relationship be damned," is the by-word of this style. The result is an aggressive, dogmatic, inflexible, and unreasonable approach to conflict management, in which the goal is to overcome one's adversary. This is often seen as a group mentality. The recent "Occupiers," have clearly demonstrated this behavior. This style often creates the conflict, rather than resolving it. The affect of such tactics on the relationship is usually not even considered until after the conflict is resolved. That may be too late. Accommodation Style This style is characterized by a high concern for preserving the relationship in the conflict, even at the price of giving up the accomplishment of one's own personal goals. The relationship is of the utmost importance. The person who has a strong accommodating style assumes that the relationship with the other party cannot tolerate serious conflict and, therefore, will give up pressing for his or her goals in order to reduce the threat that the conflict poses to the relationship. He or she assumes that human relationships are so fragile that they cannot endure the trauma of working through differences. Often, persons with this style have a high need for affiliation and acceptance, and are willing to give up the achievements of their goals in order to maintain those relationships in which affiliation and acceptance are gained. Thus, the more important the relationship is to them, the more likely they will accommodate. This often seen in the business world where too aggressive an attack may result in termination. Avoidance Style The avoidance style of conflict management is characteristic of those who are most pessimistic about conflict. They feel that it is not possible to accomplish their goals in a conflict situation and that conflict is usually destructive to a relationship. Therefore, their basic strategy is to withdraw, avoid, or move away from conflict, whenever possible. Often persons who adopt this style will leave a conflict psychologically, even when they cannot do it physically. Compromise Style Recognizing that one cannot obtain everything one wants and desiring to preserve the relationship, a person with a compromising style has the philosophy, "give a little, get a little." Compromise works in conflict, but often leaves an unsatisfied feeling. It is not fully satisfying, but, perhaps better than nothing. Win/Win Style The win/win style combines a high concern for the accomplishment of one's personal goals with a high concern to preserve and enhance the relationship, which means taking the goals of the other party as seriously as one's own. It assumes that there is an alternative in which both parties and both groups can achieve their goals and it works toward that end. It assumes that facing and working through differences has the possibility of leading to a more creative solution than can be achieved by either party or group alone. It has a high tolerance for differences and works to promote a climate of trust and openness in which both parties or groups can share their goals and hopes and work together for their mutual achievement. It would seem to me that, regardless of one's particular approach to resolving conflict situations, the win/win approach just must be the best.
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